Tarot Reading - Sarah

First, a note to my Witch's Mark community:

I hope if you're in Los Angeles, you are safe. Thank you to all of you who have reached out. The last few days have been apocalyptic, scary, heartbreaking, chaotic, and it's not over. Ultimately, we are safe. Our home is near the Eaton fire, but there's a highway between us and the worst of it, and we remain hopeful that the fire will not reach our neighborhood. We are heartbroken for our friends and our city. We are grateful to everyone working so hard to put out the fires, and for the love and support of this incredible community.

My brother, Spencer, and his wife Abby, and son, Arlo, lost their home in Altadena. They left with their passports and the clothes they were wearing, so they are very much starting from scratch. They have a really amazing network of friends and family, but they've got a daunting road ahead of them. For now, they are in as good of spirits as can be expected, they are grateful to be safe, and their 14-month-old son, Arlo, is the cutest living human on planet earth, so that definitely helps.

If you know Abby or Spencer, you know that they've spent the last two years on this house – it was their first home. Abby designed the renovation, and Spencer built it with his own hands. It was an incredible thing to watch. They lived in it as they were renovating, among the dust and power tools – plus, Abby was pregnant. What they accomplished was nothing short of inspiring. They poured blood sweat and tears into this place. The only thing left is the chimney. It's a loss that is really hard to even begin to comprehend.

Abby's brother, Jordan, has started a gofundme for them. It's going to be a very long road to recovery, and obviously there are many things they'll never be able to replace, but we're hoping to make it a little easier on them. I know there are a lot of people in need right now, but if you want to donate or share with anyone who is looking for ways to help, here is the link:

 https://gofund.me/3e454dd0

In the meantime, I'm keeping myself busy with these tarot readings that are really giving me something to focus on and are bringing me joy.

Note: I did this reading the morning before the LA fires began. I don't know if you are in Los Angeles, Sarah, and I hope if you are, you are safe.

Today's reading is for Sarah who asks:

What should I be spending my energy on this year?  I'm feeling pulled in a lot of different directions, especially after the election results.  I don't know whether to draw inwards and cocoon myself and focus on my family and home, or if I should be putting myself out there in an effort to build more community (by hosting more people, joining more groups, etc).  I've been swinging wildly between the two extremes! It's exhausting! 

For this reading, I used The Radiant Tarot: Pathway to Creativity with art by Alexandra Eldridge.

Card 1 - Current Situation - Six of Swords

In the present, you are in the middle of a difficult transformation and transition. The six of swords depicts a journey, often undertaken under duress. I often think of an immigrant story, a family escaping violence and upheaval, traveling toward an unknown future.

The six of swords also feels resonant for this horrific moment in Los Angeles. So many people have lost their homes or had to leave them behind. We are in a moment of heartbreak, destruction, and terrifying transformation. I hope that this does not apply to you, but if it does I am so sorry, and I am sending you all of my strength and positive energy.

The journey itself will take you away from your comfort zone and into unexpected and occasionally turbulent waters. However, if that sounds scary, be assured that the transformation on the other side will bring you peace. Whatever you are leaving behind must be left behind to reach better shores. In this deck, the transformation is depicted with a butterfly. You (and the world) are undergoing a metamorphosis. In the short term, this transition may stir up fear, but it will ultimately lead to change. Like you, the re-election of Donald Trump, and the literal transition of power that is upon us is fucking terrifying to me. The tarot is not suggesting that Trump’s re-election is a good thing (it’s not), but perhaps in the struggle and darkness to come, something radical and new will emerge. There are tough times ahead, but sometimes change must come from struggle.

Card 2 - Challenge - King of Cups

Your challenge in this moment is your heart. The King of Cups is the father of the tarot, a master of the emotional realm, the glue who holds relationships together. The King of Cups is a benevolent king, even-handed and kind, a gentle leader. The fact that this is placed as your obstacle suggests to me that you may believe yourself to have more control than you do. You have a big heart, you clearly are struggling with how much of your heart to sacrifice to this difficult moment in our history. You are being challenged by your emotional abilities — on one level, you have the capacity to lead and guide others, to be a calming force in a scary moment. On the other hand, if you give too much of yourself, you may find yourself depleted. In moments of uncertainty and dread, we sometimes find ourselves trying to control the world around us. It’s important to remember that small changes lead to big change, and sometimes taking care of ourselves and others can effect positive change on a larger scale.

Interestingly the King of Cups holds your dilemma in one card. The King of Cups brings people together, leads communities with his heart and emotional intelligence. But the King of Cups is also very much a parental figure. He contains multitudes. You clearly have the capacity to encircle your family and home in love and safety, but there is also a part of you that has the capacity to lead in a larger community. Therein lies your struggle, placed perfectly in the position of “challenge.”

Card 3 - Need to Focus On - Six of Cups

The six of cups is a card of family, children, and your own inner child. In this position, it feels like a pretty potent answer to your question. You must protect your own heart. You should focus first on your family and inner circle. The next four years are going to be a marathon, not a sprint, and in an emergency, you need to put your oxygen mask on first before assisting others. That does not mean you should cut yourself off from the world, or harden yourself — your reading is a mix of cups and swords. The cups side of you is caring, emotional, generous, and practiced at tending to others. The swords side of you is pragmatic, courageous, and determined to fight for fairness and truth. While the tarot suggests that you start with yourself and radiate outward as your capacity increases, it does not suggest that you should turn away from the rest of the world. At the same time, it is okay to winter, to grieve, to wrap the people you love in your protection and care, and to tend to your own complicated emotions before giving yourself to others.

Card 4 - Your Past/Leaving - Page of Swords

Pages are beginners. They often have the energy of The Fool — a kind of optimism and hope for the future that is sometimes only possible at the beginning of a journey. To me, the placement of this card suggests that you are reckoning with some hard truths right now, that your optimism has waned and that you are facing the truth of this moment. There’s no sugarcoating what we are facing in this country — things are potentially about to get bad (for many, they already are). Perhaps, like me, you were feeling cautiously optimistic about the future over the summer. But now the reality has set in, and it’s time to get clear about our values and the fight that will be needed to bring about the change we so desperately yearn for. Yes, you may be experiencing a harsh dose of reality, but hard truths lead to breakthroughs. Optimism can sometimes feel like delusion. You should not give up hope, but the tarot suggests that it is necessary to be honest with yourself about the reality of what lies ahead.

Card 5 - Strengths - Queen of Swords

Your strength is communication. You are honest, persuasive, and a leader. With the King of Cups and The Queen of Swords in your corner, you are equipped with a big heart and a pragmatic mind. You are a problem solver, and you can see through bullshit. The Queen of Swords doesn’t suffer fools, and you shouldn’t either. This placement suggests to me that you are serious about cutting through the noise and finding a way to make a real difference in the lives of the people around you. Sure, when you look at the state of things, it’s not always pretty, but you have what it takes to move yourself and others toward the truth. 

Card Six - Near Future/Moving Toward - Two of Swords

Your near future is a fork in the road, and an impossible choice. Clearly, from your question, you are being pulled in multiple directions. Right now, you are in a state of conflict, and at least for the time being, that conflict is going to remain a concern. Which do you choose — the inner circle or the world? Do you protect your heart and go inward or do you attempt to wield some control in your wider world and community? Can you be a guiding force for others or will that path only lead to suffering? I think it’s important to get clear with yourself about this conflict and where it comes from. There are a lot of swords in your reading — swords are a suit of conflict and communication. You have something to say, and you want your voice to be heard. You are concerned with justice and the truth. These are admirable qualities that you should celebrate. You’re clearly a leader. But sometimes inner conflict can distract from deeper truths. It’s time to sort through your priorities. Are you being pulled to leadership or are you seeking a sense of control in a chaotic time? Perhaps some automatic writing could help you sort through this impasse. 

Sometimes what feels like an impasse is self-inflicted. In many decks, the two of swords is depicted as a blindfolded woman with two swords crossed in front of her. She is prepared for a battle, but there is no one else in the frame. If she takes off the blindfold (which shouldn’t be hard, her arms aren’t even bound), she’ll see that she is alone. She could be holding herself back, thinking that there is a choice to be made, when, in fact, two things can be true at the same time. Maybe the solution is to take one road at a time. The tarot certainly seems to be suggesting that you begin with your own heart and your family. The struggle is going to be here for many years to come. Go inward, rest and care for your inner child. You’ll need her in the fight ahead. When you’re ready, take your desire for justice and truth out for a spin. You are definitely capable of effecting change in the world, as long as you don’t run yourself ragged.

Card 7 - Advice - The Chariot

The Chariot rider sits atop the elephant with a sense of calm and control. The sun is shining, and she has a loose one-handed grip on the reins. She’s in control, but she’s not forcing her will. In this case, I think the Charioteer is you. The tarot suggests that your journey will be one of self discovery and mastery. You are learning how to steer your destiny without forcing your hand. Life moves forward, and we move with it. In order to be in the driver’s seat of your own life, you need to loosen your hands on the reins. That might seem counterintuitive, but think about it: If the Charioteer whips and beats the elephant into submission, keeping a chokehold on the reins, the elephant may comply for a time, but eventually, she’ll gas out or turn on the driver. Instead, if you loosen your grip, and move with intention and intuition, you may find that your journey takes you to surprising places.

The coming months might be tumultuous or emotional, but if you approach your dilemma with curiosity and openness, you may surprise yourself with accelerated growth. The tarot advises that you should take your time, listen to your heart, and remain open to new things. Forget anything that you think you ought to do for one reason or another. I’ve definitely come to believe that there is a place for each of us in the revolution, and we need to be guided by our curiosity and passions. It’s okay to be more passionate about one issue than another. It’s okay to take some time for yourself and your family. The work of change is long and it takes all of us. Sometimes you have your foot on the gas and sometimes you’re a passenger. When you're on a really long road trip, you can't be the only one driving or you'll burn out.

Meditate on what a loving world looks like. Do some automatic writing about a day in the future where you feel at peace — what does that look like? Who’s with you? What simple steps can you take to make that future a reality? 

Consider what you are most invested in, which issues ignite your sense of justice and passion? Perhaps it is time to whittle down your priorities. When everything feels like an emergency, nihilism can creep in and that helps no one. You will not be able to do everything at once. Prioritize what matters most to you. Spreading yourself thin will only exhaust you. Focusing your energy will make the time you devote to others even more effective. It’s okay to make choices. And it’s okay to change your mind. This is a time for curiosity, introspection, and protecting your hope. Don’t try to control everything. Just bite off small pieces, take it one day at a time, and watch the seeds you plant begin to grow.

Card 8 - Environment - Ten of Swords

The Ten of Swords is a low point — the lowest point, in fact. In this deck a bird lies dead on the grass, multiple swords pointing at it. In the Rider Waite Colman Smith deck, the ten of swords depicts a dead man with ten swords stuck into his back. Sure, that’s not great, but it also means that there’s nowhere to go but up.

From my vantage point in Los Angeles, the environment has been destroyed, entire neighborhoods and communities leveled, the air is thick with smoke and chemicals, so many have lost their homes and everything they've ever owned. Again, I don't know if you are in Los Angeles, but if you are, this card resonates in a heartbreaking way.

The Ten of Swords indicates betrayal. From your question, I imagine that some of that feeling of betrayal comes from the world at large (and again, from LA, there are a million feelings of betrayal that we are all still sorting through and will be for the foreseeable future). I know I’ve certainly struggled with the fact that Trump not only won the election, he won the popular vote. This man is a known entity — he’s made his onerous plans clear, he’s hateful and bigoted, surrounded by idiots and ass-kissers, and we’ve already been through four years of this. I certainly feel betrayed by the people who voted for him. They know who he is, and they don’t care, or worse, they want this. 

The placement of this card in this position suggests that a lot of people are feeling this way. This is a low point for many of us. And there should be some comfort in that. There is a community of people who dream of a more inclusive world, who are open-hearted and generous, who believe that a just world is possible. All of those people are feeling pretty shitty right now. You are not alone. 

But the good news is this: change is coming. Some scary changes, yes, but good ones too. The tarot is a story about cycles, and the ten is the end of a cycle. After ten comes the ace again — breakthroughs, truth bombs, mental and moral clarity. It’s darkest before the dawn. 

Card 9 - Hopes and Fears - Knight of Swords

Knights are go-getters, travelers, conquerers. Knights act first and ask questions later. The Knight of Swords is impulsive, occasionally obstinate. He charges forward without thinking. He breaks things in his pursuit of the truth. There’s energy bursting out of him, but he would be prudent to consider where he’s going before he kicks his steed into gear. In this placement, I think the Knight of Swords is both a hope and a fear for you. On the one hand, the knight is clear about his priorities. He knows the truth, and he’s ready to fight for it. He’s optimistic about the future, and he’s willing to do whatever it takes to make it a reality. 

But I also sense a reticence in you, a fear of optimism. Hope fuels us and keeps us from descending too far into the darkness, but sometimes it feels like delusion. Sometimes we are afraid that being hopeful will make us look stupid or naive. Sometimes our hope sets us up for bigger disappointment down the road. 

This spread suggests to me that this journey will be long and there will be twists and turns. Sometimes, you will be called to charge into the unknown, fighting for justice and truth. Sometimes, you may wish to retreat and lick your wounds, care for your inner circle and yourself. Both of these options are valid, and the tarot suggests that you do not need to choose between them as long as you work to maintain balance. Priorities will be important. Boundaries will be important. You will need to say no, and occasionally that might not feel great, but that discomfort will lead to growth. Maintain a healthy skepticism but do not let go of hope.  

Card 10 - Potential Outcome - The Lovers

The Lovers card is about balance and harmony in pursuit of a unified self. The tarot often talks about masculine and feminine energies, so I will discuss that here, but it’s not about gender. Each one of us contains masculine and feminine energies, yin and yang. Masculine energy faces outward, charging forward, relying on pragmatism and rationality. Masculine energy is fire and air — passion, creativity, mental acuity, conflict. Feminine energy turns inward, associated with water and earth — relationships, emotions, the body, intuition, and the material world. Your conflict seems to be embodied by these two energies. The Tarot suggests that you have the ability to bring them into balance. The choice is a false one. Your goal, instead, should be balance. The Lovers card is about loving the self and loving others. Don’t allow yourself to be pulled in too many directions. Take care of your heart and your people in this moment of fear and uncertainty. But when you feel ready, or your capacity for the fight has returned, head back out there knowing that you have what it takes to persuade others and to lead. We will have to lean on each other in the coming years. Taking care of yourself, allowing yourself to rest and feel your feelings, to experience joy and pleasure, and to mourn when you must, will only give you strength for what’s to come.

I'm sending my love to all of you. If you're in Los Angeles and there's anyway I can help, please reach out. Thank you for being members of my community. I appreciate you.

If you'd like me to read your cards, please send me an email at WitchsMarkEli@gmail.com – I will publish your question (so be aware of that, and if there's anything you want to tell me that you don't want me to publish, please make that clear). Also, let me know a name you'd like me to use for you (it can be a first name, or it can be an alias).

Do you have a different interpretation of any of these cards? Please feel free to leave your thoughts in the comments. Stay safe everyone!